Humor · kids · parenting

Sexually Correct Happy Meals

(I usually only have time to blog once a week, but this kinda struck a nerve with me. I’d love some feedback. Yes, even if you don’t agree with me. Let’s discuss, shall we?)

I just read a blog about how evil McDonald’s is because they ask if you want a boy toy or a girl toy in your happy meal. People are actually up in arms over how sexist that is. Shame on McDonald’s, you misogynist bastards! Don’t you know girls can play with cars and boys can play with baby dolls? You disgust me!

Well, not me so much as the people who write these blogs. I could care less. And actually,  I really find it amazing that these parents have time to sit and complain about something so silly. Is this who we are now? Big babies that cry and complain over the smallest phrasing?

I don’t think McD’s is trying to be sexist. I’m pretty sure they’re just thinking, “Most boys like cars. Most girls like babies. Let’s just say boy or girl toy so they can hurry through the drive thru.” But no. These anal retentive parents would like to be asked, “Would you like the asexual Star Wars battle ship from Hasbro or the asexual Pretty Pink Friend for Life My Lil’ Pony also made by Hasbro?”  Yes, that’s much better. Geez people, I can barely handle standing in line waiting for you to say, “Number 6 with a coke.” let alone all that other crap.

And don’t try to be cute and order the “Barbie Happy Meal” because the kid on the other end isn’t going to understand what you said through the intercom. It”ll just take up more time to explain. That’s why I had to stop ordering orange Hi-C when I went through the drive thru.

“What,you want an ice tea?”

“No Orange Hi-C”

“We don’t have Orange Ice Tea”

“Just give me a fucking Sprite!”

“What? A diet Sprite?”

“I’M GOING TO BURGER KING!”

Oh wait…is this one of those gender neutral things that’s all the rage right now? Let’s not put gender on anything and let the kids figure it out themselves? Because that annoys me, too. What’s wrong with a little gender association? Why is it so frowned upon to raise boys to be men and girls to be young ladies? Sure, I watched those transgender episodes on Oprah. I understand sometimes boys want to be girls and vice versa, but I don’t see what that has to do with saying boy happy meal or girl happy meal. If you’re worried your little girl is going to get a complex because she always asks for the boy happy meal, take her to Wendy’s. Or you could do what I do. When we pull up, I always ask the kids, “You want the Transformer or the ICarly toy?” No drama.

I’m not trying to step on any toes or offend anyone, but my first thought is, really? Of all the things in the world to protest…hell, of all the things about McDonald’s to protest you pick the sex of their happy meal?

Please people, just settle down! It’s a flipping Happy Meal. Be happy.

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11 thoughts on “Sexually Correct Happy Meals

  1. I don’t disagree with you on this. I think some people really do have too much time. We all know that there will be gender association at some point in our lives. Little girls will try to be more mom and boys will try to be more like dad.

    If my daughter wants to play with cars, sure I have no problem with it, but she is going to play with them differently (as a boy will play with dolls differently). I think we should raise children with their genders in mind, but remind them that they are not limited because of their sex.

    1. Exactly! My son actually plays with his sisters baby dolls (and actually she plays with his trucks, too) and we are all totally fine with that. But when he sees me painting my nails and wants in on it too, I explain that boys just don’t do that. (though some boys do, but we’ll save that talk for when he’s a teenager.) Or once he asked if he could wear one of my crop tops. I just told him boys don’t wear shirts like that.(at least not in Ohio…and not since the ’80’s) It was never an issue. End of discussion. When he’s 18 if he still wants to wear nail polish and crop tops in his house, he’s more than welcome to it! But for now, I think my job is to ‘direct’ him towards the boyish things.

  2. I think people should be WAY more up-in-arms over what’s in Happy Meal food than what makes up a toy, but that’s a whole other issue. I do think having a “girl” toy and “boy” toy is pretty dumb, but I’m not going to write angry letters or anything. It all goes back to kids getting everything catered to them now. They should toss in a toy, gender be damned, and be done with it. If they absolutely have to cater to a child’s every want, they need to just label the toys differently. Do you want a doll or a car? Do you want a bug or magic wand? Why associate a gender with it at all?

    1. Agree! Remember back in our day (yeah, that just happened) when you got a car, you got a car. If you got Miss Piggy, you got Miss Piggy. And never once when I received a ‘boyish’ toy did I ever question my sexuality or ask my parents to let me get a sex change. Nor did I throw a fit over what toy I got. My kids are actually pretty good about that, too. I think it’s cause they know those toys will most likely be in the trash within a couple months time anyways!

  3. Some parents have nothing better to do with their time than bitch about the happy meals. If you are THAT concerned, feel free to stay home and cook dinner for your kids.

  4. There are always people in this world who can bitch about anything. Good Grief! Aren’t there more important things in this world to get involved in? If you are offended when you are asked if you want a toy for a boy or a girl, simply say, “surprise me,” and be on your merry way. Happy Happy, Joy Joy. Problem solved…lol.

  5. You just can’t make everyone happy! No matter how hard we try there will always be some cry baby Bonnie out there who has to be different and try to stir up trouble! I don’t understand the big deal! For gods sake ask your kid “boy toy or girl toy” and them decide! It’s a freaking 50 cent toy, they will throw down or destroy and I’m sure the fact that the little 14 year old on the other side of the intercom asked “boy or girl” isn’t going to have an impact on any child 10 years from now!

  6. The real problem isn’t the kids meals anyways! I want my meals to come with something a little extra too! And I’m not talking diabetes, heart attack, or high blood pressure!

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