Humor · kids · Motherhood · parenting · SAHM

I May Have Actually Taught Him Something

I’m a horrible mother. Not in like a “let me unchain you from the wall so you can eat brussel sprouts” kind of horrible.  Horrible in the “Let’s get started on your homework” kind of way.

And the “Do you want me to help?” way.

And the “Oopsies! You’re suppose to capitalize the ‘I'” way.

I know…it’s horrible, right?

Obviously, I’m being snarky right now, but to my tired 7-year-old, I was being horrible. And after a few more, “If you don’t know how to spell it, sound it out.'” and “Your words are sitting too close together. Erase that one and write it again, honey.”, he began to sigh dramatically and grumble, “I know, Mom.” And finally worked up to a dramatic sigh with the eye roll. Great.

“Do you not want my help?” I asked.

“I JUST WANT TO DO IT MY WAY!”, he exploded.

So we got into a little tiff. I thought it was a tiff, anyway. Maybe a heated conversation. But as we worked on the next question, he burst into tears and took off for the bedroom.

So I started supper.

I know my kids well enough to know the difference between a ‘tired’ fit and a ‘something’s really wrong’ fit. In both cases, though, you have to wait until the fit is over before discussing it. Otherwise, I start a “FINE THEN BE THAT WAY BUT YOU BETTER STRAIGHTEN UP OR YOU’LL NEVER RIDE YOUR BIKE AGAIN!” fit.

A few minutes later I hear crashes and kabooms coming from his room. So I check on things cause a good mom makes sure her 7-year-old doesn’t possess bombs and the like. No bombs, thank goodness, but he is really mad. Like wicked mad, yo. So I tell him, “I don’t know why you’re so pissed off, but you need to stop destroying my house. If you’re that mad, why don’t you get out your journal and write about it. ”

I never in a million years thought he would. When it got quiet, I thought he took a nap. And hours later, after we finished homework and he rode his bike and we ran some errands and he hugged me and told me how much he loves me, I found this sitting on his desk.

April 2013 322

“Mom is a idiot. I hate mom now. I am pissed off.”

I love it! I do! And I’d kinda like to frame it! Maybe a lot of moms would be beside themselves with grief over their first piece of hate-mail from their kids, but I love it! Look at the spacing in between the words! It’s practically perfect! And he capitalized his ‘I’!!! Sure, there’s a few misspelled words, but isn’t it a good thing he doesn’t know how to spell ‘idiot’ and ‘pissed’?! Though it’s really bugging me that he said, ‘a idiot’ instead of ‘an idiot’, but we’ll work on that later.  Anyway, I’m just so proud of him for taking his anger and using it in a better way than throwing toys and punching pillows. And he listened to me! Hello!

I’m feeling pretty good up on my mommy soap box right now. And I know that the actual horrible thing I have done is posting his private thoughts for the world to see. But this is a one time thing. It’s never gonna happen again. I will be respectful of the little bit of privacy he is allowed. I promise.

I think. Stay tuned.

Thanks for reading!



6 thoughts on “I May Have Actually Taught Him Something

  1. This is fantastic! In an act of solidarity, I wanted to upload a picture of my 3rd grader’s wall covered with handwritten copy paper posters reading “I hate mom!” and “Mom sucks!” I was impressed that everything was spelled correctly and her handwriting was very neat. My handwriting is nearly illegible when I’m that mad. Ha!

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